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Our friend Brian first brought this new glorious product to my attention.  It’s not just the Ministry of Agriculture that could use someone outside the circle as a consultant.  The snack makers at Lotte maybe could have–should have–run this by a native English speaker before throwing it out there on the market.  This was no problem before when Korea was pretty much a closed society, and there was no internet–or snarky bloggers on the internet.

Let’s get Ricetarded (ha), let’s get Ricetarded in here!

What do we have here?

It’s a basic little spongecake-based snack cake.  These custard ones have been getting popular in Korea in the past couple of years.  Last year, a cheese flavored one came out that kicked ass.  Oh, props should go out to Dan of Seoul Eats for donating the super-mini tripod (along with the camera he donated much earlier), which lets me take better shots in low light.

So, what’s in a Ricetard?

I just love saying that word.  Say it with me.

RICETARD.

Yes, the word comes from a blend of “rice” and “custard.” But it’s not a rice custard.  The cake uses rice flour.  They point out many times on the package that it uses 100-percent Korean rice.  This may be one of those campaigns, like the ddeokbokki/topokki one, that is trying to save Korean rice farmers from international competition.

The filling is vanilla-flavored cream and what they call “orange jam.”

“But Zen, isn’t it full of trans fats and all that unhealthy gunk?”

No, bubba.  See that guy in the doctor’s coat?  It’s well-being.  It has vitamins B1 and B2 along with niacin.  That healthy, bro.

Oh… hmph…. mwo mwa fhwf mwafhf…sorry… was eating my Ricetard.  It tastes like any other snack cake–more like a Twinkie.  You can see there’s a hint of that so-called orange jam, but I didn’t taste it in the sea of sugar.  Lemme try again.

Hmm… nope.  Well, okay, there’s a hint of something in the middle of that petroleum jelly textured “cream.” Maybe it’s the orange jam.  May have to try another one.  Talk to ya later.

UPDATE: It looks like the powers at Lotte got word of the word on their word, and Ricetard no longer exists.

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